Tour correction

My first show is actually  Thursday 27th  ….tit!!!

looking forward to the tour

The music is done the lighting is plotted…now for the start. Friday week in Dunstable


Good Judgement?

Paul  Gascoigne’s remark to a black “Bouncer” got him a 1000 pound fine. He told the man to smile so he could show himself. As bad as that is, it does start alarm bells ringing. Are we suddenly going to get historical racist charges brought against people who have used humour against, or I should say about, non white people? Do we lock me up for chalky? A lot of people would say  ”Please do”, but remember I devised chalky as  a winner, in my mind, at that time, I tried to not generalise but pick a character that was loveable like Stavros the dodgy kebab salesman.  Do we then lock up the writers and performers who wrote Love thy neighbour? Where will it end? Might I take offence at something Lenny Henry says about white people?  Nonsence  Is it ok for white people to laugh at the Kumars?

The judge during his summing up apparently said  to Gascoigne to “keep his mouth shut” so  the next time I see a non white person on the front row and knowing that what I say as a joke might cause offence . I will keep my mouth shut and ignore that person and take the piss out of the bald white bloke next to him. What if I have fun with all the front row except the black man? is that ok?…come on judge…is that the way forward? Who decides what’s funny and what isn’t? It’s the way you say it surely?

Paul should go find the bloke he upset and have a cup of coffee with him. If the guy was so upset he cried..that’s not good. Paul said he didn’t mean to offend…that’s the thing, he didn’t mean it. really ? but it was said to get a laugh at that bloke’s expense. Paul’s not a comic. His judgement is not that of a comic. Plus, that is not an original line. It is not the first time I have heard that line. “I didn’t mean it to cause offence” What he means is “I didn’t think he’d take offence” there is a difference. It is a fine line. A comic has to make a millisecond decision as to wether the victim of your joke will enjoy the being the but of it..not just laugh because they have to but to enjoy it..enjoy being included. This judge thinks not…. time to Zip up…sad


If the rumours are true,an alls tars CBB is being put together. Trouble is they will only have the ones they can afford….. Bye!

We have been invaded

I went to a farm shop today to find that it had been captured by aliens. Strange thin things that resemble ageing  humans. They wear a tight hugging sort of lycra stuff that makes their genitals look like an astray full of walnuts!   They must be connected to the Amish folk of America as they use no car, but ride on ancient things called bicycles,  they shout to one and other as they pass.  They are angry with car drivers. They don’t consider them selves to be accountable for the laws of the road and are constantly angry with all that are. Now their leadership has taken over the Olympic games, with even sillier headwhere. The big leader is obviously not human as he does not sing the national anthem and sticks his tongue out in a way to show he is bigger than the country. He is in fact what’s known on Earth as a TWAT.

Don’t forget me and Jimmy Jones are on at the Circus Tavern for Care after Combat in Oct   give em a call

Brands Hatch

Care after Combat staged a rock concert on the weekend of the British Super bikes  at the world famous circuit. I compared the day after driving 250 mikes to get there! The show was fantastic with three thousand happy people and 1 complaint!(about me of course)

Tony Lorenzo opened the proceedings with three really good songs ,then it was the turn of the fantastic Just Floyd  and they were spot on. These were followed by Who are you. A Who tribute band who wow’d them then came the sound of Rod and the faces. and ending with John Coglan’s Quo. it was a fantastic day and night with the crowd donating over three thousand pounds for the charity.  I slept for 12 hours after and then had to do a 500 mile round trip to Skegness for a show!!

there’s no business like show business.

Jimmy Jones

Me and Jimmy will be doing two gigs together this year,both for Care after Combat      the first is the 7th of Oct at the world famous Circus Tavern  and the second is with Jethro and me at the Care afterCombat gents lunch at the Dorchester on the 28th November.  Table of 10 is 1750 inc wine and dinner.


England were were not

We are now out of Europe

Good news to me…I love a challenge. Charlton are out of Europe, now we need to get Europe out of Charlton.

We need now, to get together and make this work instead of all this silly wingeing       We are Free!

A great Golf day

I am typing this in agony after two days of golf. I have a swing like a bull frog that pulls all my back muscles out every time I hit the ball…which is not very often. The tournement was organised by Jon Barnes from Price Waterhouse Cooper, who raised us over 30 k. Fantastic effort!  ooohhhh me poor back!!